One day I was sitting in church. Every prayer that was offered, and for every blessed piece of bread and water, I heard the word REMEMBER. It tugged at me and urged me to learn more.
Some of the definitions of the word remember are:
1. To recall to the mind with effort; think of again
2. To have (something) arise in one's memory; become aware of (something) suddenly or spontaneously
3. To retain in the memory
4. To keep (someone) in mind as worthy of consideration or recognition.
5. Engineering To return to (an original shape or form) after being deformed or altered.
This word—remember—is everywhere in the bible. Our scriptures repeat over and over that we must remember Christ. Remember that the worth of souls is great in the sight of God. Always remember Him and keep His spirit to be with us.
In 1st Chronicles 16:12 we read: Remember his marvellous works that he hath done, his wonders, and the judgments of his mouth.
In Revelation 3:3 it says: Remember therefore how thou hast received and heard, and hold fast, and repent. If therefore thou shalt not watch, I will come on thee as a thief, and thou shalt not know what hour I will come upon thee.
In 3rd Nephi 17:7 it says: Have ye any that are sick among you? Bring them hither. Have ye any that are lame, or blind, or halt, or maimed, or leprous, or that are withered, or that are deaf, or that are afflicted in any manner? Bring them hither and I will heal them, for I have compassion upon you; my bowels are filled with mercy.
After reading just a few scriptures I realized that Christ wanted me to remember that through Him, many have been healed. His miracles have changed hearts, and souls, and bodies, and minds.
So as I was fixated on this word and the call to action that it seemed to be beckoning to me, I began to pray for a glimpse of all it could mean. And instantly I realized that "to remember" was the fulfillment of a promise.
And I believe that when Christ asks us to remember, He is asking us to bring to light all His miracles. Those that are recorded in His Holy books, but even more—those that we have seen in our life.
When we take that bread and water, or whatever rituals we do to commune with Him, I believe He is asking us to look back over our week, our month—and even our life time—to recall the times He was there.
We know that grace is the love of Christ—the pure love of Christ. We anticipate that it can help us be made whole at the end of our lives—when Christ will come and make up for all we could not do.
But what about today? He promised us that He would suffer for all of our pain, our sins, our shortcomings and addictions. So I cannot believe that He will just be waiting in the wings while we hurt alone. I believe He is there. I believe that He plays a role every single day. I believe that when He asks us to remember Him, He is pleading for us to see His hand in our life . . . now.
He was not just a man who walked the earth long ago, or a story we have heard. He lives. He lives in our hearts, but even more He stands by our side, every moment of every day. Through the trauma and lies, through the heart ache and pain, through the laughter and joy.
But what stops us from knowing and feeling and seeing is those lies—beliefs that come with trauma and pain, lies that build and fester in fear and hate—false beliefs that stem from chaos that cause us to forget all that we came here to REMEMBER.
He sent each of us to this earth with truths. One of those truths was the knowledge of the power of grace. Though many have forgotten that promise, it is still available to each of us. No matter where we have been, or what we have failed to see . . . He is there. And each of us is worthy of His love. And it is His love that can heal our pain.
To science He is a mythical part of imagination. To those who have not seen His hand in their life, everything we do is mere coincidence. Every blessing . . . just good luck. Every failure, a shortcoming of another person’s weakness, or proof that we will always fall short.
But to me, He is the only One who is truly real. Though I can’t explain why, He has given me many chances to REMEMBER, and those moments are times I cannot ever forget.
That night in my closet—when I walked in to beg God for a do over—that was the closest to Heaven I have ever been. Though my body had just been through more trauma than I ever knew possible, my spirit was connected to God.
Those promises I felt, and that pure love of Christ that filled those walls—that was the truth. And looking back now, I know that it was God showing me what I had to fight for. Grace. The application of Christ’s love in my life. I felt it stronger in that moment than I ever had in my life, and I will never forget how whole I felt, in a moment when I was truly broken.
And the many hard fears in the hours before, on the couch with those detectives, and even the bumps in the road—that followed in the years to come—were just moments that I could show Him I hadn’t stopped fighting for that love to be part of my life again.
He doesn’t wait for our death; this is the day that grace is going to be applied. The moments we stand in our story and in our heart. Showing Him that we always remember. We get to understand that life is not for nothing. We get to come to the relationship with God that teaches us that we are not alone. We get to understand what grace is: the knowledge of our Savior’s love and the application of His presence in our day, just one of the many gifts He sent us here to REMEMBER.
It is when we are connected to His love—and to the purpose that He sent us here for—that we truly can overcome. It is not the traumatic event that a person has to endure that breaks him or her . . . it is the beliefs that they hold onto that told them they were not enough, that they were forgotten, or alone.
Once you take away those lies and darkness—and replace them with truths and light—the healing power of grace has room to change your life. The past, the present . . . and the future.
I know He lives. I feel Him every day. He knows your name. He is the only one who will ever understand your pain. He can change you, and His power will heal you. You are not forgotten. And—just as He asks us to do—He REMEMBERS you.
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My letter: Dear Trauma